Why Can’t People Just Have a Good Heart?
Why Can’t People Just Have a Good Heart?
Y’all, my whole life I’ve found myself asking the same question over and over again…
What is wrong with people?
Not because they made a mistake. We all make mistakes. I’m talking about the things that seem so obvious to me—being considerate, being thoughtful, doing the right thing, using a little common sense.
I have always gotten so upset when people do things that just don’t make sense to me. Sometimes I get angry. Sometimes I pray about it. Sometimes I vent. Sometimes I completely lose my patience.
For years, people would tell me I was overreacting.
Then I married my husband, Welton.
Whenever I’d get worked up over something someone did, he’d say, “Tammy, not everybody is the same. Not everybody has your heart.”
At first, I hated hearing that.
I’d think, “What do you mean? What they did was rude. I would never do that to someone.”
But over the years, I’ve realized he’s right… even though I still don’t like it.
The hardest lesson I’ve ever had to learn is that not everyone thinks the way I do.
If someone goes out of their way for me, I naturally want to do something for them.
If someone helps me, I remember it.
If someone is hurting, I want to help.
Not because I’m keeping score. Not because I expect applause. And certainly not because I want recognition.
Honestly, I’d rather nobody even know.
The only One whose opinion really matters already knows.
I don’t do nice things so people will owe me something. I do them because that’s just who I am.
But I would be lying if I said it doesn’t hurt when someone can’t even show basic kindness or consideration.
It breaks my heart.
Not because they didn’t “pay me back.”
Because I can’t understand why being thoughtful doesn’t come naturally to everyone.
Maybe that’s my flaw.
I still struggle with accepting that not everyone has the same heart.
I tell myself all the time, “Stop going out of your way for people.”
Then what do I do?
I go right back to doing it.
Every. Single. Time.
Because I can’t change who I am.
One day I’ll write another blog about loyalty, because that’s a whole different story. I am one of the most loyal people you’ll ever meet. But if you intentionally do me wrong, I can also walk away and never look back.
That’s another conversation for another day.
Today, I just keep coming back to one simple thought…
It really isn’t that hard to be kind.
It isn’t that hard to think about how your actions affect someone else.
It isn’t that hard to have a good heart.
And maybe that’s why people think I’m difficult.
Maybe they think I’m too emotional or too outspoken because I refuse to pretend bad behavior is normal.
I don’t know.
Maybe they’re right.
Maybe I’m different.
But if being different means caring too much, giving too much, or expecting people to treat others with kindness and respect…
I’m okay with that.
One more thing I’ve realized…
Maybe this blog has become my therapy.
Instead of bottling everything up, I get to write it down, let it out, and move on.
Maybe that’s what I needed all along.
So if y’all keep reading…
I’ll keep rambling.
Who knows?
Maybe somewhere in all these words, we’ll figure life out together.
Y’all, my whole life I’ve found myself asking the same question over and over again…
What is wrong with people?
Not because they made a mistake. We all make mistakes. I’m talking about the things that seem so obvious to me—being considerate, being thoughtful, doing the right thing, using a little common sense.
I have always gotten so upset when people do things that just don’t make sense to me. Sometimes I get angry. Sometimes I pray about it. Sometimes I vent. Sometimes I completely lose my patience.
For years, people would tell me I was overreacting.
Then I married my husband, Welton.
Whenever I’d get worked up over something someone did, he’d say, “Tammy, not everybody is the same. Not everybody has your heart.”
At first, I hated hearing that.
I’d think, “What do you mean? What they did was rude. I would never do that to someone.”
But over the years, I’ve realized he’s right… even though I still don’t like it.
The hardest lesson I’ve ever had to learn is that not everyone thinks the way I do.
If someone goes out of their way for me, I naturally want to do something for them.
If someone helps me, I remember it.
If someone is hurting, I want to help.
Not because I’m keeping score. Not because I expect applause. And certainly not because I want recognition.
Honestly, I’d rather nobody even know.
The only One whose opinion really matters already knows.
I don’t do nice things so people will owe me something. I do them because that’s just who I am.
But I would be lying if I said it doesn’t hurt when someone can’t even show basic kindness or consideration.
It breaks my heart.
Not because they didn’t “pay me back.”
Because I can’t understand why being thoughtful doesn’t come naturally to everyone.
Maybe that’s my flaw.
I still struggle with accepting that not everyone has the same heart.
I tell myself all the time, “Stop going out of your way for people.”
Then what do I do?
I go right back to doing it.
Every. Single. Time.
Because I can’t change who I am.
One day I’ll write another blog about loyalty, because that’s a whole different story. I am one of the most loyal people you’ll ever meet. But if you intentionally do me wrong, I can also walk away and never look back.
That’s another conversation for another day.
Today, I just keep coming back to one simple thought…
It really isn’t that hard to be kind.
It isn’t that hard to think about how your actions affect someone else.
It isn’t that hard to have a good heart.
And maybe that’s why people think I’m difficult.
Maybe they think I’m too emotional or too outspoken because I refuse to pretend bad behavior is normal.
I don’t know.
Maybe they’re right.
Maybe I’m different.
But if being different means caring too much, giving too much, or expecting people to treat others with kindness and respect…
I’m okay with that.
One more thing I’ve realized…
Maybe this blog has become my therapy.
Instead of bottling everything up, I get to write it down, let it out, and move on.
Maybe that’s what I needed all along.
So if y’all keep reading…
I’ll keep rambling.
Who knows?
Maybe somewhere in all these words, we’ll figure life out together.